Chapter 2

Danbr got more excited the longer he walked. He stepped quickly in grand strides. His eyes shot around everywhere. Every plant, every person and every piece of garbage was inspected in the hopes of finding something wonderful. Burke eventually left to check on some things and plan out the week. Danbr’s route weaved through his neighborhood, downtown, and around a school.

Nothing.

Not a single remarkable thing. Even though he knew finding something was unlikely, he was disappointed. Back at his apartment, he fumbled with his keys and went in. He was very hungry.

“Hello!” greeted a throaty voice from somewhere in the room, “You owe me, sleepyhead.”

“Excuse me?” Danbr said, “Who are you?”

A grubby footlong thing with bat ears, gross rubbery wings and a crooked, boney halo floating over his head clumsily hovered in front of Danbr’s face. “I am your guardian angel, and I have saved your life once again.” It’s breath was awful, like old socks full of rancid fruit. “You owe me. Just something from your pocket, you won’t remember this in two seconds. Whatever’s shiniest.”

An unfamiliar vorax, a large one wearing an orange scarf, stepped out from around a corner. “This one has the blessing. Sorry.” It then threw a cloth sack of metallic-sounding objects on the ground with a fragile sounding ‘thud’ and turned to the window.

“What do you mean, Kelsey?” The little gross thing barked back.

“When a human saves a vorax’s life,” Kelsey the vorax explained, “That human is immune from vorax feedings. So the deal we have doesn’t apply to this guy.”

The strange creature, (the winged bat-eared thing, not the Vorax,) turned to glare at Danbr. “Well isn’t that nice for you.” He turned back to Kelsey, but he had vanished out the window leaving the sack. A few of it’s contents had spilled out.

The strange little creature flew over to it. “This is going to take AGES to bring back to my nest.”

“Could you please tell me who you are, what you are, what just happened and where I fit into all of this?” Danbr was so hungry he wondered if he could eat it. He wasn’t proud of this.

    The creature sighed. “My name is Cuztos. I’m your guardian angel,” He bowed sarcastically, “I check up on you every now and again, and if your life ever needed saving I saved it. And then I took my payment.”

“...That’s nice.” Danbr eventually decided. “How much do I owe you?” He took out his wallet.

“I obviously can’t use money. Look at me. I accept small, decorative trinkets for my nest. The shinier the better. Kelsey, that misty-looking numbskull that just floated away, is my pack-mule. In return for carrying my haul, I let him eat the memories I leave behind.” He scowled. “...Usually.”

“Fair enough.” Danbr said, reaching into his pocket. “so what did you do to-”

“Buddy, I can’t be taking anything else from you right now.” Cuztos moaned. “I already have all of this to take home. I don’t think I can ever help you again.”

Danbr stared off into space for a second. He needed to know how to react to this. First, he’d need some information. “How often do you save my life?”

Cuztos was on his way out the window with a trinket in each foot. He turned to Danbr and sighed. “Do you remember the time you were walking home and that tree got struck by lightning and fell next to you?”

“Yes…”

“Okay, well, I pushed you out of the way and you gave me the lid off your Snapple. Do you remember the time you were living at home and you left the gas on in your dad’s car, locked the keys inside and couldn't leave the garage because the house door was locked and the garage door was faulty?”

“Vaguely, I was pretty dizzy by the time the garage door finally opened.”

“Yes, hello, that was me. You gave me the batteries out of your walkman.”

Danbr smiled. “Thank you… Thank you so much!”

“Save it. We’re done.” He took off out the window. “Don’t touch my stuff!”

Danbr had finally decided how to react. He decided to be: upset.

Cuztos sounds like a really valuable friend to have, he thought. I have to make sure that saving me is still worthwhile for him.

While Danbr thought, Cuztos returned to the window. “Danbr, something’s been bugging me. When did you do this vorax saving? You’ve been passed out for three days.”

Danbr was surprised by this news. He was hungry and sore, but otherwise felt normal. I’ll have to call work. I might have to let the police know I’m okay. And my family. And I’d really like to eat. “P-pardon?”

“Yeah, you put the stove on, and then there was a big magical windy ruckus, I dunno, I think maybe you hit your head or something, and you were out cold for three days.”

“So you took care of me?”

“Yeah, well, I turned the stove off.” He tilted his head. “I probably saved a lot of people’s lives in this building, actually. I should collect…”

Danbr dug around in his pockets. He found a few quarters and a nickel. Cuztos shook his head.

“As tantalizing as that freshly minted nickel is,” He said, admiring the shine, “I simply can’t accept anything from you. Your business is worthless to me if I have to haul all my stuff home every time I help you.” he grabbed a few more things in his feet and awkwardly flapped out the window again.

Danbr peered over at Cuztos’ sack. Among the bits of glass and candy wrappers that had fallen on the floor, he spotted a tattered, dull coin. He picked it up. It was fairly big, about an inch and a half in diameter. It had a bikini-clad woman on one side and a motorcycle on the other. Danbr recognised it as a ‘challenge coin’, something a friend of his father’s used to collect. This one seemed to have belonged to a member of a biker gang. It stood out from the rest of the items for being so dull. Cuztos must have some sentimental connection to it, thought Danbr, because it doesn’t match the rest of his things at all. Cuztos appeared at the window and Danbr stuck it in his pocket.

“Did you touch my things?”

“No.”

Cuztos looked around the floor. “Did you see a big coin with a lady and a motorcycle on it?”

“I did not.”

“Huh. I thought I saw it but it must just be in the bag.” He grabbed a few more things and took off.

Danbr ran to his kitchen. He only vaguely remembered how to do what he was about to do, and hoped he had it right. He pulled out a dish, he filled it part-way with vinegar, and dropped the coin in it. Cuztos returned.

“Do you want anything to eat?” Danbr called.

“Water. Bread? Bread. In little bits.” He took off again. Danbr pulled the coin out of the vinegar and ran to the bathroom, where he scrubbed it with his toothbrush under cold water. The coin had some (but not all) of it’s luster restored. In any case, it looked better than it had. He went into the living room again to see Cuztos with his head in the sack.

“Where’s my coin, moron?”

“Here,” Danbr said, wondering if this idea was even worth the effort, “I shined it up with my… human… magic.”

Cuztos stared wide-eyed at it. “I can see myself! How?”

“Tell you what.” Danbr said, “If you give me everything that’s mine from your haul and continue being my guardian angel, I will work my human magic on whatever you bring me.”

Cuztos replied immediately, “Help me carry my sack back to my nest and change ‘everything’ to ‘one thing’ and you have a deal. You’re a disaster, most of this stuff is yours.”

Danbr frowned. “Deal. Where’s your nest?”

“In a tree a street over.”

Danbr walked over to the bag and opened it up. It was kind of sweet how inconsequential the things inside were. He was half expecting to find jewelry, weapons and teeth, but instead found things like rocks, beads, small toys, and candy wrappers.

“I’ll just take this,” Danbr said, pulling out a key to his storage unit he thought he’d lost.

“Fine,” replied Cuztos, whose little rubbery arm was having a bit of trouble holding the challenge coin still. “Let’s go.”

He hid in Danbr’s jacket, his upper body sticking out of the neck hole. The smell was making Danbr lose his appetite, but his appetite had a long way to go.

“Here,” Cuztos said, pointing at a thick patch of foliage. “I live in that big tree in there.”

Danbr had always been rightfully wary of walking near, let alone into, patches of foliage in the middle of the city. He was always afraid someone might be living in them and didn’t know where to knock. But he swallowed his concerns. He didn’t want to pay the storage people to chop the lock off his locker. “Alright.”

The little forest area was about the size of a house lot, on the corner of a big park. There wasn’t a path, it was just meant to be looked at. On the ground was thick, tall grass, short scratchy bushes, weeds and bits of soggy garbage.

Cuztos jumped out of Danbr’s jacket and flew into an old, rotten looking birdhouse nailed to a branch. It was slightly higher than Danbr was able to reach.

“Can you really fit all this stuff in there?”

“Of course not. I like to keep my favourite things in my house, and then bury the rest.”

“Should I bury this bag for you?”

“You can just set it down and go home.” Cuztos said. “I’ll take it from here.”

“Thanks.” Danbr said. “And just so we’re clear, you’re still my guardian angel?”

“Mmhm.” Cuztos replied, “I’d be sad to lose you. You’re a train wreck.”

“Good.” Danbr said. “I’m going to go home and make sure I still have a job. And eat.” He turned and started out of the bush.

“Wait!” Cuztos called.

“Yes?”

“Don’t step on that nail there. You’ll get tetanus.”

Danbr spotted the rusty number in question poking out of the dirt that he’d almost stepped onto. “Thank you!”

“Wait!” Cuztos called again.

“What?” Danbr said, looking worriedly in all directions.

“That wasn’t free.”

Danbr pulled the storage key out of his pocket and grudgingly handed it back to Cuztos. Grumbling, he climbed his way out of the patch of forest.

Danbr stood at his apartment’s stoop. “Psst,” a voice called down. It was coming from an umbrella leaning next to the doors. It opened slightly. A bit of black mist oozed out along with one of Burke’s glossy, expressionless eyes. “I found my umbrella!” He said proudly. It popped open and Burke appeared from within it, scarf, eyes and all, in a poof of black smog. He then closed the umbrella and tossed it over what could be approximated as his shoulder. “A vorax is only half a vorax without his umbrella.”

Danbr got the building opened. “I suppose you use it to stay dry?”

Burke nodded in his own way, as they both entered the building. “To stay dry and defend ourselves. The vorax have many enemies.” This wasn’t a shock. “I’ve planned out the first few days of this week, I think you’ll be pleased.”

Danbr had a question ready for Burke when they entered his apartment. “Hey, Burke, why didn’t you tell me I’d been unconscious for three days?”

Burke tilted his head. “It was just three days.”

“I haven’t eaten!”

“You don’t have to eat every day.”

“Yes I do! Ideally three times!”

Burke was surprised by this. “I thought people just liked eating. No wonder you die all the time.”

Danbr rolled his eyes and walked over to the fridge.

“I’ll make it up to you,” Burke said. “I found something to show you tomorrow you’ll think is really interesting. A new friend. I can’t shake the feeling you’re a lonely man.”

“Sounds fun.” Danbr said, trying not to sound offended.

There was nothing in the fridge but six-day old chinese food and peanut butter. In seconds flat, Danbr was sitting on the floor in front of an open fridge, chipping his teeth on a green onion cake he’d scooped up a wad of peanut butter with. Burke stared fascinated from the opposite counter.